Consolidation
You folks may remember that a couple of weeks ago I wrote on the possibility that one or more of the Madison Consolidated elementary schools may have to be closed down due to financial problems. This week I want to address the issue of local schools again, but from a somewhat different perspective.
Since writing that column I have talked with two people who are very familiar with the thinking of the school board on addressing the financial problems. A possibility they’ve discussed: Consolidation of the Madison and Southwestern school systems.
A suggested name for the new combined school system is Jefferson County Consolidated Schools. My understanding is that the Southwestern officials and residents of that district are opposed to the idea — so far. But there are some good reasons for such a consolidation, if it comes to pass.
First, a reassurance to the people of the present Southwestern school district: There would still be a Southwestern High School and junior high. The consolidated district would have two high schools — the same number that exist now in two districts.
With one district, that would mean only one superintendent and school administration office, plus one school board — expanded to at least two more members to ensure that all parts of the county would have representation. We’re talking some major savings of taxpayers’ money here, it seems to me.
Would any elementary schools be eliminated? Well, the board believes that one school could go, without requiring expansion of any other school. Eliminate more than one school, and expansion probably would be necessary.
If the consolidation took place, Deputy students might be bused into Southwestern Junior High starting with sixth grade, instead of Madison. Seems to me that might make more sense, anyway. I haven’t measured to be sure, but isn’t Deputy closer to Hanover than it is to Madison?
Understand, I’m not saying this is going to happen, because obviously I don’t know. I only know what these two people told me — and as I said, they are very familiar with what the school board’s views are. Stay tuned; it may become a topic of public discussion soon.
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Ever hear about the Irishman who went to sea, was shipwrecked, and washed up on a deserted island in the South Pacific? He came splashing up the beach out of the surf, dripping wet, shook his fist in the air, and shouted, “Who’s the giverment here? I’m agin em!”
Ever hear about what Samuel Johnson, the great English lexicographer, said about England’s neighbor just to the west? “The Irish are a fair people; they never speak well of each other!”
If those two anecdotes sound familiar, maybe you’ve been reading some of the posts on Old Madison. Can’t we discuss things on here without arguing, making snide remarks, and implying that someone else is either in the tank, on the take, or stupid? There’s an old saying, “Keep a civil tongue in your head.” All too often, we don’t. Oh, sure, you see this kind of thing on most any website with bloggers. Sometimes the interchange is interesting or amusing. But all too often, it just leaves a bad taste in too many people’s mouths.
Can’t we try to set a good example, instead of just following along with a bad one?
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And finally, since I’ve done some imparting of information that many won’t like, and some preaching, here’s something for your funnybone. I don’t know who wrote “The Philosophy of Ambiguity,” but it was forwarded to me by my good friend Sgt. Z of Charlestown.
1. Don’t sweat the petty things, and don’t pet the sweaty things.
2. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor …
3. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
4. If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still HAVE monkeys and apes?
5. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, “Where’s the self-help section?” She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
6. What if there were no hypothetical questions?
7. If a deaf person signs swear words, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
8. If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
9. Is there another word for synonym?
10. Where do forest rangers go to “Get away from it all”?
11. What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
12. If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
13. Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
14. Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
15. If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
16. Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
17. If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
18. Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines?
19. How do they get deer to cross the road only at those yellow road signs?
20. What was the best thing BEFORE sliced bread?
21. One nice thing about egotists: They don’t talk about other people.
22. Does the Little Mermaid wear an algebra?
23. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
24. How is it possible to have a civil war?
25. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown, too?
26. If you ate both pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry?
27. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
28. Whose cruel idea was it for the word “lisp” to have “S” in it?
29. Why are hemorrhoids called “hemorrhoids” instead of “assteroids”?
30. Why is it called tourist season if we can’t shoot at them?
31. Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?
32. If you spin an Oriental person in a circle three times do they become disoriented?
33. Can an atheist get insurance against Acts of God?
Old Corporal <corporalko@yahoo.com>
Consolidation, and some comedy, – Saturday, July 26, 2008 at 20:00:08 (EDT
